Maman has been spraying me with rose water!
Mais oui, when we go out walkies in the dank Brittany weather, I do get a little wet and mucky. And dare I say it, un peu whiffy.
Mais sacre bleu! Rose water! I’m going to call the SPA.
I’m not averse to a bit of attention. And Dog knows I have my fair share of skin issues, so Maman is always at me, like some zealot Earth mother, squirting, and wiping and dipping and sponging.
Next she’ll be bathing me in asses’ milk! Asses’ milk!! Asses’ milk?? Is that even a thing?
Maman tells me that it’s actually a big thing here in France, where it’s used for all sorts of skin conditions.
Apparently Cleopatra did it. I guess if it’s good enough for her…
Just when I think we beastioles have been exploited to the max…
Next people will be putting snail slime on their wrinkles. NON! … Maman tells me that this is already a thing. Oh merde, je vais vomir!
Or having little fish nibble the crusty bits off of their feet. La vache! This too?!
Honestly! You hoomans!
What are you like?!
I’ll stick to the rose water, thanks!
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